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Oct. 9th, 2003 | 02:54 am
mood: what do you think my mood is?

i thought i would post to say that i am doing okay, but then i would really be lying. seeing her and not being able to talk to her or listen to her or even acknowledge her... hurts so fucking much.

step one, stop crying over her.
step two, ah.. who the fuck am i kidding. i can't even make it past step 1.

anyway, i guess on a better note.. i ran into an old college friend tonight. it was good seeing kyle again. sadly though, i spent 90% of my conversation time with him... talking about her. surprise suprise.

i hate that i still love her and she doesn't give a shit about me.


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Comments {28}

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from: datbobjo
date: Oct. 9th, 2003 07:14 pm (UTC)

I know you love her. But having read your journal and typed at you elsewhere, I believe you are expecting too much too soon. Let yourself go through the grief process. It's going to fucking hurt like hell, like it does right now. Also know that this pain will not forever be this acute or this overwhelming. You don't want to hear this. Tune me out if you must. It will get better. It won't be in way you expect it to be or when. Let this hurt. We are here for you to fall back on.

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from: visions
date: Oct. 9th, 2003 10:36 pm (UTC)

thanks bobbie. the thing is, all i wanted was us to keep open our channel of communication, even if it was only email.

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